Topic: Odd Figures: Tombstone Tackle & His Terrifying Tushy Trap  (Read 997 times)

Slimebeast

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From the 1980s Ghostbusters toy line comes this musclebound maniac who is into sports and... wants you in his backside right now...


"Who you gonna call?" - Chris Hansen, you creepy sons of bitches!

The Ghostbusters line at one point included a series of "Haunted Humans" with various frightening and absurd hidden features. While most of the line was forgettable, like "X-Cop" whose facade simply drops to reveal a crude skeleton, the all-star winner of this series of missteps was Tombstone Tackle.

He's your average beefy jock, but when you turn him around and press down on the back of his head, (tee hee) a gruesome face barfing a movable evil football is revealed!


So the anal monster barfs out a smaller creature it vored.
Get bent Al Gore, this guy invented the internet.

I suppose the concept was that a sports stadium somehow became haunted, and one of the team members became possessed.

Then, when he's about to hike the ball to the QB... SURPRISE! Ass monster.

Note for the locker room: Don't snap him across the hams with a wet towel - you'll give the poor, cursed freak a nosebleed.

However, outside that very specific scenerio, you realize that this guy is designed entirely around bending over and surprising a vulnerable and unsuspecting victim. Tombstone Tackle starts to seem less like a fearsome football fiend and more like an urban legend concerning truck stop restrooms.

"Don't go drivin' 'round about midnight... but if ya have to, don't use the men's room. You never know if that inconspicuous male prostitute in full football garb might be the back door butcher."


Imagine how horrified little Timmy was when his mother misunderstood the request for that new "butt toy."


If Tombstone Tackle is not in Ghostbusters 3, played by Duane "The Rock" Johnson, I'm going to boycott the film. And no, I'm not just saying "Ghostbusters 3" for the traffic. Ghostbusters 3 three sequel prequel casting cast news update information new movie film natalie portman.


BONUS!


He's very excited to show you his verwandelbar.

In Germany or some other place I know equally little about, the "Haunted Humans" were known as "Spukis," and our beloved Tombstone Tackle became "Gary Grossmaul."

The backdoor butcher has a name, and it's Gary.

« Last Edit: April 15, 2019, 09:19:08 PM by Slimebeast »