Topic: CRP-0002, Toilet Paper Person  (Read 6303 times)

Slimebeast

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on: November 12, 2019, 07:56:58 PM

CRP-0002 floating stinkily peacefully.

Item Number: CRP-0002

Danger Level: Zero Purple

Restraining Directives: CRP-0002 is to be kept in a 8' x 8' aquatic tank. Water must be kept calm, and is to be gently skimmed for debris when necessary. A simple mesh lid is to be affixed to the top of the tank when not being cleaned.

Description: CRP-0002 is a vaguely humanoid-shaped conglomeration of what appears to be various types of standard toilet tissue. Entity appears to prefer an under-water habitat, in which it floats on what could be referred to as its "stomach". Observed behavior is similar to that of a manatee. CRP-0002 floats motionlessly with an orifice visually and mechanically similar to a "mouth" hanging open. When CRP-0002 encounters soft, decayed and/or digested matter, it draws said matter into its orifice using two tendril-like "arms" consisting of loosely braided paper.

CRP-0002 was discovered in ███████, ████████, where it was found clogging a sewer drain. City workers reported the discovery by posting a video recording CRP-0002 to the internet. All copies of this video are presumed to be located and deleted via take-down request and/or hard drive destruction. The institute would suggest these workers be reprimanded, but their current line of employment is considered punishment enough.

If left unfed for a period of seven days or more, CRP-0002 will slowly and ineffectually attempt to escape its tank. CRP-0002 itself does not appear to expel waste, but will occasionally "belch" foul-scented bubble rings. Whether these rings in any way denote an attempt at communication is currently under investigation.

Further Information: All CRP staff are instructed against referring to CRP-0002 as "Number Two". While it may be fitting short-hand, procedures must be adhered to nonetheless.

« Last Edit: November 12, 2019, 08:05:39 PM by Slimebeast »