Show Posts

This section allows you to view all posts made by this member. Note that you can only see posts made in areas you currently have access to.


Messages - HopelessNightOwl

Pages: [1]
1
Yikes! Customer Reviews / Re: Expandingland
« on: May 24, 2019, 03:45:52 AM »
Rating: ★★

Customer: John Doe

Review: For a place that claims to be always expanding, they sure don't seem to have been expanding their parking options.

2
Rotten Toadstools / Re: Justin the Assassin
« on: May 19, 2019, 06:11:11 AM »
🍄 (Moldy)

Reviewer: Anonymous

Review: Only a smut factory like Icon Productions would produce something like this. This movie is clearly about Jeff the Killer, but since JTK is more or less public domain they had to change the character name.  It retreads the whole Jeff the Killer story point-for-point.  Protagonist moves into town, and a gang of four popular kids led by a kid named Cody beat him up for being a faggot. The cops and his parents blame him for it, at which point his brother Lucas decides to take the fall and goes to juvenile jail.

Their version of the birthday scene is a scene in which the class is on a fieldtrip to the zoo and Lucas and his friends decide to throw Justin into the gorilla exhibit. One of the gorillas rips Justin's face off. Justin is taken to the hospital quickly enough that they are able to sew the face back on, but it's baggy and deformed like an old person. Then he goes insane and starts calling himself beautiful and kills his parents. Then he kills Lucas and the other bullies.

The movie is exploitive and bloody.  There is nothing redeeming about it. And the fact that they teased a sequel with their version of Jane the Killer, don't even get me started.

3
Rotten Toadstools / Justin the Assassin
« on: May 19, 2019, 05:37:48 AM »
Title:Justin the Assassin (2019)
Rating: Unrated
Genre: Horror/Slasher
Studio: Icon Productions

Rating: 🍄 38% (Moldy)

Description: A high school student who just moved into town gets picked on by the popular kids. But when one of the bullies goes too far, he gets more than he bargained for.

4
I Did the "Staring at the Sun With Binoclulars" Ritual, and Now I'm Blind

5
I Did a Ritual I Found Online, and I Have No Regrets (Part 2 of 12)

6
I Went Back In Time to Stop 9/11, but Then I Ended Up Doing 9/11 Instead

7
I'm Being Stalked By a Creepy Goodyear Blimp With Faded Paint

8
m/NoStory / The Unredisappearance of John Doe
« on: May 12, 2019, 05:02:49 AM »
The Unredisappearance of John Doe

9
I Was  a Delta Operator Who Was Wounded in Iraq and Now I Do Wet Work For Disney

10
m/NoStory / I'm a Crip, and One Drive-By Still Haunts Me
« on: May 12, 2019, 04:47:01 AM »
I'm a Crip, and One Drive-By Still Haunts Me

11
m/NoStory / I'm in the IRA and this is my story
« on: May 12, 2019, 04:40:20 AM »
I'm in the IRA and this is my story

Pages: [1]